This afternoon I went shopping to buy a new toaster. I kind of dropped the old one and did some major damage. Anyway I bumped into a former friend who I knew from the local school. She was ever so excited to tell me that her kids were away staying with relatives for the school holidays and that she was a FREE woman. Don't get me wrong here. I don't have a problem with kids going to school, one of mine still does go to school five days a week.
I do however have a problem with people that can't even stand the site of their kids, even in the school holidays. For gods sake, they are at school for most of the year, is it so hard to give them a little bit of your time? Especially in this womans case, she does not work so has five days a week to herself. Previously in a past life, when all my kids were public schooled, we looked forward to the school holidays when we could have some quality family time together.
When I first started to homeschool the boys just over a year ago, a lady at the local bookstore, where I purchasing a great big pile of books for school time, said that she admired my courage. She herself, just could not wait to send each and everyone of her babies off to school! I had to bite my tongue, to stop myself from inquiring just why it was that she had them in the first place. Afterall, if you just have them to get rid of them, why have them at all?
Life is never going to be perfect, we all have bad days, whether we are kids or not! But to all those people who "can't wait to get rid of your kids", just remember, they will be grown up before you know it! They will leave the nest and they will remember whether or not you gave them the time of day! Whether you made time for them to remember as good times or simply as a time of "getting rid of them". And don't complain when your old yourself and the kids don't want to have anything to do with you. Or they put you in a nursing home so they can just "get rid of you". It works both ways.
So instead of sending them away for the holidays. Try spending some time with them. Play a game, go for a walk, go to the park. Anything, as long as you are together. Try listening to what they have to say, instead of sending them outside to get them out from under your feet. You might surprise yourself! You may even actually like this little person you gave birth to. Go on! Try it! I dare you!
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
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10 comments:
I am with you, I never quite understood some people's eagerness to get rid of their kids. I have to work this school holidays so hubby is home with them, but I have been going home to join them for lunch each day and WISH I was spending all day hanging out with them!! I couldn't imagine sending them off for the school holidays and then sitting around on my own -just doesn't make sense to me!
Takes all kinds I guess.
It's a sad thing that wanting to spend time with your children and do the very best you can for them makes you one of a minority. This is a little off topic but the other day I saw a snippet of a talk show on television and heard mothers who choose to breastfeed their children (amounst other traits) described as a sancti-mummys. I, like many mums, mother with my whole heart but not for accolades but because it's what I do and who I am. Am I really sanctimonious? Thanks for the good read. Sian
Oh. Yes.
My son goes to kindy three afternoons a week, for two hours ... and I miss him when he's not with us! I have loved the holidays we've just had!! I know someone who seems to need to escape her family a few times a year, and I Just. Don't. Get. It.
Nice post, K.!
I agree totally! I see so many parents who seem to not be able to stand their kids, much less want to spend time with them. Poor things! They don't even know the difference, luckily, I guess.
Your essay has been nominated for Hot Stuff Of The Week by our readers over at GNMParents. Congrats, and good luck in the voting!
When we were homeschooling we heard comments like that all the time. It made me so angry that people felt that way towards their children. Then mine started going to public school and we still looked forward to breaks with the kids. Then we started doing foster care (bringing us to 6 kids) and for the first time in my life I was looking forward to school. It made me wonder if perhaps 2 children to most people is what 6 is to me? I don't know. I do miss being with them all day, but I also relish the quiet time.
innocent observer - I have been in both situations too! Up until a year ago all of my kids went to school and I spent a lot of time at the school so have witnessed a lot! Kids need their parents and family to want them no matter how naughty they might be. They all just need some unconditional love and the time of day!
I used to wonder that too until I had my own brats. At that point it's a little late to send them back! Then I go and home school them so I never get a break! I don't know what my problem is. I just can't seem to get rid of these nuisances. If we would just follow the government's guidelines for good parenting we'd probably be fine.
i home-schooled for 12 years with my 3 kids. It was great until high school subjects seemed to overlap so much that I couldn't find enough hours in the day. I started feeling crabby all the time and decided to stop being "school-teacher" and just be mom again. I also had a job doing my husband's business' paperwork at home. It all worked out and they each graduated from the same high school that their dad and I graduated from. They are all three in college now (at the same time) and doing fine. I miss those years, but this is the way it's supposed to be. I will never regret all that time I spent with them. It flies by so quickly. Seize the day!! P.S. We take vacations with them now and it is a wonderful experience to be with them as young adults.
Last chance to effect the voting for our weekly poll (of which you are a nominee) over at GNMParents. Normally I try to stay clear of the poll, but your essay really grabbed me in the heart.
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