Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Returning to reality.....

Some of you may have noticed that I switched this blog over to private for a long while. I hope you did not think you were un-invited or anything. Its just that I was feeling rather depressed with the state of things and felt like I had nothing happy to say, so better to say nothing at all. After a few nasty comments on one of my posts that I really took to heart, I gave up.  In short, I had forgotten my usual Miss Pollyanna attitude towards many things and did not want to pass on that negativity to you. I guess in a way I decided to take my own advice and step back and take a little time to find myself and breathe.

This is much easier to do when one is not distracted by what everyone else is doing. My general health had declined since last year and our trek into being a school attending family again was a huge adjustment for us, well especially me, feeling the way I do about such matters.

During this time I stepped away from most of my homeschooling and un-schooling friends blogs. I missed them greatly but I found that the more I read, the sadder I became with our own situation. I really needed to focus on making things work here so I stopped following, I stopped reading and I guess I just kept up with those who are friends with me on facebook. It was easier.

In all honesty I began to think I probably should not have gone on the un-schooling camp as it only made me think too much again. We had an AWESOME time though so I am truly happy that we did go. It was so wonderful to catch up with friends and to meet others who I only knew from online and find that they are just as lovely in real life. :-) 

Stepping away though, has proven to me that I really needed this time to re-evaluate, work out what it was I wanted from life  or more so how I was going to fit it all together so I could return to living my truth while at the same time pleasing others who are always going to be a part of that truth. 

I spent a lot of time listening to those around me, acknowledging all the differences between us all, thinking, thinking and thinking some more and then letting go of things that would normally bother me and feeding my thoughts  with positive energy.
But mostly I have been working on getting myself healthier, eating, exercising and healing my body and spirit.  Therefore healing my mind as well.   

I was in a place where I was feeling overwhelmed, sad and unhealthy,  where one thing after another in my world seemed to be going against me. So I left and kept it all to myself lest I scare my lovely readers away. 

One step at a time I have faced my fears, my worries, my spiritual needs vs my wordly ones and with several pretty strong messages from this universe lately. I am reminded of the person I am inside, the person who a year ago would never have imagined feeding such negativity no matter what.  The person who faced every situation with love head on. The person who spoke her mind with truth instead of holding back for fear of upsetting someone. 

So with this in mind I am changing my blog name to Karisma Speaks. I intend to write and speak from my heart, from my own truth and hope that my friends have not deserted me in my grumpiness and anti-social state. 

I am back my friends and very much looking forward to catching up on all the posts I have missed. 

May your lives be filled with Love, Light and Peace at all times. 

Hugs and smoochies xoxoxox


8 comments:

  1. Welcome back beautiful. Take your time. I know my posts are brief and limited in number this past year and a bit. If I wrote everything I was thinking I would be here all day and the chickens would miss my bantering on to them if I did that hehe.
    I am glad you are healing one day at a time :)

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    1. thanks Caz. You make me smile because if I wrote down all my thoughts I would have no time to do anything else. I really do think a little too much. LOL I miss my chickens. We don't have any, anymore.

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  2. Oh, Karisma. This is BEAUTIFUL. I am so glad to feel (and I do feel it), your powerful positive energy coming my way. I'm sorry that you found yourself in that negative spiral; I know it well. I am so glad you've taken time to find yourself again, to nurture and be true to yourself and face the things you needed to face. I'm kind of bursting with feeling about this, about you "speaking," and saying Here! I! Am! and for all the love you beam out. I think quiet time is as important as words—you know I value it and have made time for it myself. I am not even close to deserting you.
    Much love right back, dear friend (who I KNOW I will meet one day :) )

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    1. Yes we will. I am thinking 3rd time lucky. We will meet very soon. Hugs xox

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  3. Karisma, I will read your words with joy no matter where you are blogging or what you are blogging about. I am sorry that your blog brought negativity into your life. Sometimes it can be difficult to remember that we are the owners of our thoughts and what we put out is open to interpretation but ultimately not for negotiation. I am so glad you are back and that you have found peace in your life.

    ~Jess

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    1. thank you. And I agree, I do not blame the blog in any way for my negative thoughts. I just did not have the heart to share those thoughts and pass it on to others. I have recently remembered a lot that I had forgotten. Will share in later posts. :-)

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  4. Welcome back Karisma. I'm glad you're finding your health and happiness again.

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  5. What a delight to find you in my reader this morning! Good for you for taking the time you need and doing what needs done for your health and spirit. Love that you are back as I do so enjoy you!

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Speak to me! You know you want to!